The first two still do it for me in the hotness diversion stakes,butMAFS could not be leaving me colder.
MAFS contestant Sara,pictured with “husband” Tim,has been frequently accused of “not taking the experiement seriously” and “not being here for the right reasons”.Supplied
What used to be a reliable guilty pleasure that was funny while simultaneously making me need a shower to rinse off the shame of watching has devolved into something that’s lost its grubby sparkle. (Not that most viewers seem too bothered – it’s still far and away the right now.)
Eleven seasons in,it’s not just that the premise is predictable. It’s that the fakery which is the foundation of reality TV feels tired and tedious rather than terrific.
Every time I tune in there’s theMAFS gang,badgering someone in a massive pile-on for not being serious about “the experiment”. For those not familiar,“the experiment” is referenced constantly with reverence usually reserved for the Ark of the Covenant or Michael Bolton’s baritonal roundness.
Hey guys,it’s just the construct behind a TV show. You’re not discovering the secret to humanity. And we’ve twigged you’re doing this for social media followers,not for the “right reasons” – another thing everybody talks about ad nauseam but never explains what those reasons are or what the wrong ones would be.
Not that you can hear me,busy as you are giving a phony dressing down to the Colombian-Canadian bride and bagging the fella in the ankle-breezer jeggings who rates himself but doesn’t sexually rate his wife. But any producers out there,my 10 cents’ worth is thatMAFS has lost its water-cooler status because its fakeness has gone beyond.
Historically,I like fake stuff. I have fake tits,fakeish hair colour,love fake whipped cream in a can and that $34.99 Costco cake which is like heavenly chocolate air. So much so that Chris and I had two when we got married,piped with “Don’t Stop Believin’” and “Time Magazine’s Wedding of the Year” – yep,fake messages on fake-tasting cakes. Awesome.
I’ve faked orgasms,faked interest in people’s renovations,faked enthusiasm for Aperol Spritz. I faked unconsciousness on a school camp. I’ve faked emotions to conform to societal norms or manipulate people’s perceptions of me. I’ve faked expertise – sure,I can GHD your hair – and once faked gossip about someone I didn’t like and spread it around the office.
Not sure where you are on fake vs real,but truth is we’re all living in an age of fake happiness. Especially on social media,which saw the world lose its mind over the Princess of Wales’ manipulated photo and sparked my need to take the temperature on how much fakery feels healthy right now.
In a time of AI,deep fakes,fake news,are we getting over fakery?
We all show a positive face. My kids had it drummed into them that if anyone asked how they were,the answer was “very well,thank you” even if their appendix was bursting. Now I wonder if politeness was put before true wellbeing.
It’s powerful what fakery does to our minds. We’re told to turn that frown upside down,fake it till you make it,psychology will follow physiology. All while being instructed to rip off masks and be our authentic selves. Yeah,being real is a complicated process.
Without getting too existential,possibly the most dangerous place to find fake happiness is within yourself.
I’ve learnt the hard way that the stories you tell yourself have to be real. As your life’s narrator,a genuine voice is what builds trust for and from others. Creates integrity,respect and confidence.
So I say keep up the fake tan and Insta filters but be honest when next asked how you are. And stop that narrative in your head where you’re always the victim or everyone hates you. And write to theMAFS makers telling them to get their couples to stop with the phony lecturing.
Kate Halfpenny is the founder of Bad Mother Media.
*Married at First Sight is owned by Nine,which also owns this masthead.
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