Hiding behind anonymity,people neither respect nor feel bound by codes of behaviour. But players are educated in these matters and refreshed in their education annually.

Everyone in the AFL should understand the hurt they might cause,and if not,at least know that there will be a penalty if they give rein to abuse.

They also know that,unlike in the suburbs and the bush,everyone is watching and listening.

That makes what Jeremy Finlayson flung at an Essendon player on Friday night all the more mystifying and disturbing.

Whatever piqued him in the moment,of all the epithets he could have reached for,he chose a cheap and nasty homophobic slight. Nearby players and umpires heard it,and it’s not hard to imagine that,as in that park game five years ago,some squirmed.

Contemplations in the aftermath have dwelled on how closely or not Finlayson’s transgression paralleled others,and what penalty should apply. The AFL has not helped by protracting its so-called investigation,which is now into its fourth day. It already has a guilty plea.

Finlayson admitted his wrongdoing to Port officials at the time,apologised to the Essendon player after the game and made a public statement of remorse on Sunday. For that,at least,he can be acknowledged.

But whether or not Finlayson meant the insult personally or was just searching for an all-purpose barb,and even if he did not realise in the moment the offence in his choice of word,the fact that it was anywhere near the tip of his tongue at all should give cause for pause.

However far we think we’ve come in the vigil to rid sport of prejudices,it’s never far enough. No one objects to robust exchanges,but everyone should know the no-go areas and why.

I don’t know what level of fine or suspension is appropriate for Finlayson,but I do know that it should have the effect of that young man in the park five years ago and his quiet but firm admonition:

“That’s enough.”

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