“When you’re first at home with a baby,it can be quite a grind. I spent hours just sitting awake at night with her,alone in the dark,” says Syfret. “But knowing I had a podcast to listen to or a show to watch helped me have something to look forward to,almost. It was a way for me to stay connected to who I was as a person outside of being a mum,without compromising the attention I was giving her.”
On a recent afternoon at her home in Sydney,Rebecca – who is using a pseudonym,out of fear of being judged by fellow parents – began to experience what she thought was a panic attack. It was a rainy day and,with her two young children at home on school holidays,the living room TV was booming a rerun of a particularly beloved episode ofDora the Explorer.
“I couldn’t focus on anything properly – it felt as if there were pins and needles throughout my entire body and like my brain was stuck in a fog,” she says. “I thought I was going to be sick at one point,it was searing and visceral. But as soon as I put in my headphones,it began to pass.”
Rebecca and Syfret are among a growing number of parents turning to noise-reducing and noise-cancelling headphones as a tool of parenting,not for their children but for themselves. “I hate to think about the kind of judgment I’ll receive for doing it,but it’s the only thing that stops me from going crazy,” says Rebecca.
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Though using them for different reasons – and with children of different ages – both parents are adamant that when it comes to using noise-reducing or noise-cancelling headphones,there are clear rules,with the number one being:only when the children are in the same room.
“I would never use them when Beatrix is in bed or not in my line of sight;it’s more an escape when you can’t actually escape them,” says Syfret. “It allows me to be physically present but mentally somewhere else,which you sometimes need for your sanity.”
Rebecca agrees,saying,“I’d never use them to sleep,but I also can’t watch another episode ofDora for as long as I live.”