Writer and filmmaker Martin Ingle grew up in a religious environment in which sex before marriage was taboo.
I went to a church-run school,and I loved it. In fact,coming from a line of priests and bishops,as far back as I can remember I was heavily immersed in church life as a culture,a community – and a morality.
I believed that when you had sex you literally split your soul apart like aHorcrux,sharing it with your partner. Then every time you had sex with a new person,you were splitting into smaller and smaller pieces,chipping away at yourself – diminishing,eroding – and exponentially too. This is what sex meant.
As a teenager,sex was an uncrossable line,a wall. It was un-undoable. I was never tempted at parties. It was just not an option,as unthinkable as bashing someone’s brains in. Sex was serious business. Sex was sin.
So,I did well in school. I grew to a leadership position. I was that model Christian student. But it was a model,it seems,precariously built.
After school,I was confronted with the real world,which was totally incongruent with what I’d been taught. This goes for many things,but above all,sex.
I lost my faith in those first few years. Still,I wouldn’t work up the courage to even attempt any kind of sexual activity until I was almost 23 years old.