Fitz: All of those players you mention won many grand slam events. In the 1999 Wimbledon championships you burst on the scene,beating world No.1,Martina Hingis 6-2,6-0 as a 16-year-old qualifier – perhaps the biggest upset Wimbledon ever saw. Your glorious future was obvious. Do you have any regrets that one way or another,youdidn’t end up winning Wimbledon or other majors?
JD: No. I think if you take into account my whole life experience both on and off the court and everything that I went through,to be honest,to have gotten as far as I did is quite an achievement. And I think when I look back,I am very,very lucky to have evensurvived and to be here today. After what I went through,I’ll take a grand slam semi-final in singles,a final in doubles,and No.4 in the world any day,because at one stage there was a real chance that I was not going to ever be able to live a normal life or evenbe here,so ... no regrets. And especially because a lot of the things that did happen were out of my control. I was a child as well. I’m very proud of where I am today and how far I’ve come.
Fitz: On that subject,you’ve been extraordinarily open about the “mental,emotional and physical abuse” you received from your infamous father,Damir,from the age of six. His explosiveness was no secret. Did the tennis world do enough to protect you,to at least reach out and say,“Hey,Jelena,are you OK?”
JD: Look,I think that’s probably a question for others. Do I know people that definitely knew of things that were going on? Absolutely. Is it a very different world to what it is today,in terms of how we look at general child abuse and domestic violence? Absolutely. But look,that was the whole point of me writing my books and being open about it,to help someone else and to see what changes we can make. I never told my story to blame anyone. We didn’t have enough measures in place to protect kids like me. But we do now.
Fitz: But what of us in the media? I remember having many goes at Damir Dokic,and making merry at his expense,but not doing what we should have done,which was inquiring afteryourwelfare.
JD: I do talk a little bit about the media because I just felt,at the time,they all did interviews with my father who was obviously very aggressive and drunk nine out of 10 times when he was doing interviews. And I just wish someone would have said,“Look,there are two underage kids going home with this person,and that’s not OK,” because my brother was eight years younger than me. And I wish maybe that there was a little bit more concern instead of making him a joke and a punch line. When my book,Unbreakable,came out,I can’t tell you how many journalists came to me personally and apologised,and I really appreciate that.
Fitz: Well,you have my apologies,too. If this is too painful,please ignore and we’ll move on,but when was the last contact you had with your father? And were you able to say,“What you did to me was totally unacceptable”?
JD:[Softly.] I last had contact about 10 years ago. And yeah,I even tried to reconcile with him once or twice ... I think no matter what happens,you kind of hope that maybe you can kind of salvage a relationship when it comes to family. Those dynamics are always very difficult. But it’s very hard,when someone doesn’t have any remorse or can’t say sorry. In fact,what he says is that he would do it all again. So,for me,that is very,very hard. I had to make a cut and go,“I don’t need a toxic person or a toxic relationship in my life.”
Fitz: What about your mother and brother? Are you in contact with them?
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JD: Yeah,I have a great relationship with my brother,which I’m really glad about because my father used my brother and weaponised our relationship – not allowing me to talk with him for about seven years,because he was so much younger than me. But yeah,today we have a wonderful relationship. We pretty much talk every day,and with my Mum as well. I’ve had some tough conversations with her because she was on my father’s side – but we’re in a good place today.
Fitz: Your mental strength is inspirational,and I also admire very much the way you stand up to trolls on social media. I was shocked,however,by thepiece you wrote in theHerald last year,on how vicious those trolls are on body-shaming and so forth. Despite your mental strength,is it not wise for you just to stay away from social media and not read that toxic sludge?
JD: I could take that road. Absolutely. But I don’t want to. I want to be very open and honest. And I want to fight for things that are important – whether it’s domestic violence,child abuse,mental health,or trolling. The easiest thing would be to block the trolls,but why should I? I’m not hurting anyone. I’m not doing anything wrong. In fact,I try and use my platform for something good. So I wanted to take that toxicity on. I want to send the right message out there that we shouldn’t hide behind it every time we stay silent with abuse. It’s kind of like we were allowing it to happen. Silence is the worst thing that we can do when it comes to abuse.
Fitz: When you’re playing,your ambition was to win Wimbledon. What is your ambition now?
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JD: Look,I am very content with where I am in my life and professionally. I just want to continue doing what I’m doing. I want to fight for the right things and really important issues in society. I want to be the best commentator I can possibly be,as well as doing a lot of public speaking. I want to continue that and continue spreading that message and continue trying to make a difference.
Fitz: I know I speak on behalf of everybody,Jelena,when I say that although life has dealt you a very strange deck of cards,you’re playing them wonderfully well. Good luck.
JD: Thank you so much.